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Being Lost Sucks

When I started this blog I said I was going to be real and vulnerable.  So…let’s be honest.

I lost my way.

Jammies

This is how I’ve been feeling for the last few weeks.  Like I want to curl up in a ball, in my jammies, on the couch.  Those MRI results really kicked my ass.  Well, attaching myself to what my body isn’t able to do is what was really kicking my ass.  I feel like I’ve lost the spark I had in January & February. Where did all that mojo go?  I let it get away by attaching to the negative and losing sight of my goal.  Climb a mountain in 2014.  It’s the reason I started all this!

I’ve been on a roller coaster of emotions this past month. Trying to let go of the resentment I feel about how the injuryMelsha-4-153 happened and accepting responsibility for the fact that I didn’t listen to my body when it was trying to communicate with me.  I’ve cried and I may have even done some kicking and screaming! The scale hasn’t moved.  I stopped keeping my food journal. I put those supporting me at arm’s length. I ate some comfort foods (not THE QPC). I missed some workouts. I am struggling. For real. The thought of quitting has crossed my mind a few times but I’m not ready to give up.

 

dip

I feel like the guy in that boat in the picture above.  I’ve had lengthy chats with Life Coach, Aly Pain this month. She introduced me to the concept of The Dip. Have you heard of it?  It’s a book by Seth Godin.  Aly explains the concept in her blog The Dip – Another Look At The Change Process. She starts discussing it as a tool for entrepreneurs but I wanted to share it with you because I believe it applies to anyone with a goal. If you watch the video in her blog post, I think I’m a 3.

How do I get out of this mess?  I KEEP GOING.  Keeping going through it all.  Feel it all.  Let it go and just keep going.

Dear Lost Melsha,

Melsha-4-135I can see that this set back has a grip on you. It’s ok to feel the way you are feeling.  Let’s shift our thinking.  Let’s focus on all the things that our body can still do.  We’re going to reach our goal!  It might just take us a little longer but we WILL get there, I promise.

Get the food journal out again, ask for help when we need it instead of shutting yourself off from the world, don’t miss a workout and now that it’s nice out why don’t we add some walking?  Let’s choose foods that fuel our body instead of feeding it. If stepping on the scale doesn’t feel good right now, don’t do it!  Let’s accept the past few weeks for just what they were – a set back.  We have the choice to get back on track and find our spark again!  Let’s do this!

Lots of Love & all the support you need,

‘We made it to our goal’ Melsha

I want to climb a mountain this year – that’s the goal.  To be real, it may not happen due to my recovery and I’m starting to accept that.  I am hoping to be able to at least hike one in late summer/early fall somewhere in the Great Canadian Rockies!  I’m going to carry on with my training, as my body allows, and see just how far I CAN get.

*Mind shift in progress.*

 

 

 

8 Comments on "Being Lost Sucks"

  1. Jenn says:

    Being the guy in the boat in that lake isn’t always a bad thing. What you’re doing is really hard, and big goals = big hurdles. It’s ok to feel frustrated and defeated, but the reality is, you aren’t defeated. All you’re doing is allowing yourself to be human, and that’s more ok than anything else. It gives you a chance to breathe, rest, and then come back even more invigorated than before.

    You’ve still got this. <3 Much love! (PS – LOVE the jammies!)

  2. Bri says:

    Such a beautifully authentic article Melsha. I definitely understand what it feels like to have a setback and want to give up. Your image of the true road to success hits home. I’m in the boat with you! You are powerful and totally inspiring. Keep loving yourself and your journey. I believe the dips make us stronger in the end.

    • Melsha Shea says:

      Thank you Bri! I’m with you…the dips do make us stronger and I am grateful for them. It’s easier to see that once I’m out of the dip. 🙂

  3. Aly Pain says:

    I love you. I love you with all my heart for all the vulnerability and heart you have. You are a precious gift for fully revealing yourself in the dip, and liberating others in the process. Change can be hard. If it were easy, everyone would be doing it! The key is you have the emotional and mental strength to look “the dip” in the eye and keep going, where the majority turn back and quit. Kuddos to you, my friend. You will climb a mountain, you already are.

  4. Joanne says:

    I look forward to hearing more about the dips and highs in your journey.

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